Author Archives: themustressmhor

Many people who read the adventures of the Mustress have wondered if the Robbing Butcher ever does anything useful or positive. The Mustress has received many emails on the subject, and this attests to the level of interest which the Robbing Butcher instills in the reading public in general. A few correspondents also seem toContinue reading “Mr. Mhor Delivers A Surprise”

There seems to be some confusion about the New Hens at the moment. The Robbing Butcher is, as ever, keeping his cards close to his chest, but the village in general is puzzled. Yesterday, the Robbing Butcher announced that he had obtained some more New Hens. Well, that’s a good thing, surely – after all,Continue reading “The Mustress Launches An Investigation”

Just after Christmas, The Mustress Mhor asked the Robbing Butcher when he intended to open after the New Year festivities were over. Readers must bear in mind that we are in Scotland, where Hogmanay is celebrated with gusto for many days (and months, in some cases). The Robbing Butcher gave a hollow laugh, stared atContinue reading “The Robbing Butcher Fails To Deliver”

Yes – shocking news here from Mhor Cottage. Mr. Mhor today served a superlative breakfast, but he neglected to fry the left-over potatoes from last night’s dinner, and add them to the plate. There very potatoes had been placed (by The Mustress) on top of the circular square sausage supplies in the fridge. The MustressContinue reading “Mr. Mhor Forgets The Potatoes”

Comrades, today Mumsnet allowed the Mustress to return to their hallowed website. It was a time for great celebration. The two-week ban was lifted (without prejudice, I hope.) Not that the Mustress’s crimes had been terribly reprehensible. Oh, no. There was just a minor disagreement/spat between the Mustress and MNHQ. Possibly some opprobrious remarks wereContinue reading “The Mustress Gets Some Good News”

Things are coming to a pretty pass when there is only one slice of haggis in the fridge. There is no Stornoway black pudding and only four eggs (from the new hens). As for circular square sausage, you would think it did not exist. Sadly (for Mr. Mhor) there is also no fruit pudding, althoughContinue reading “Desperation Abounds in Mhor Cottage”

Bewildered does not begin to cover it. Shocked is nearer. The Robbing Butcher has only sent me a “FRIEND” request on Facebook. Why would be do this? Has he got wind of this website, this blog? Does he think I will share my profits when a publisher notices this blog and decides that it isContinue reading “The Mustress Becomes Really Suspicious”

Many, many years ago, Mr. Mhor was a small boy. His class at school were taken to the Opening Day of the Blair Drummond Safari Park. All was going well, until the teachers got Class X (yes, I know – that needs a post to itself) to sit under a tree. The animals – deer,Continue reading “A Giraffe Eats Mr. Mhor’s Lunch”

Well, I have wondered for long enough. What is the correct term for circular square sausage? How could The Mustress find out? Ha! As ever, the answer was close at hand. I finally had a lightbulb moment earlier today. I SHOULD START A THREAD ON MUMSNET ABOUT IT. Yes – this was definitely the onlyContinue reading “Mumsnet Fails To Decide”

I have long wondered if my interest in the RB’s opening hours is perhaps bordering on the obsessive. After all – surely the Robbing Butcher has some sort of schedule. Nobody could run a business without one. Could they? Well, anyway – this morning I was perusing the village FaceBook page (always a place ofContinue reading “The Robbing Butcher Confuses The Entire Village”